Written by Michelle C.
Being one not fond of New Year resolutions, my personal desire for 2020 is to live a life closer to God than it’s ever been. Sacrifices, though not easy, are a must to become more Christ-like. My heart’s desire is to be Christ honoring, loving, forgiving, nurturing, etc. Though not easy, I had to make some changes immediately and will continue to do so with decisions made in the future.
There was something in my life I knew I had to take care of before I could begin my goal. Paul tells us in Ephesians 4:31-32… “Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” It’s humiliating to admit you’ve been wrong, but with that comes humbleness, and humbleness is becoming Christ-like.
I’ve recently had to apologize to someone for not only being a hindrance and a stumbling block to them, but more importantly, to their ministry. I was angry, bitter, and my heart was full of malice. I not only listened, which was partaking in wrongdoings, but from my very lips, I gossiped (spoke evil) about them. I allowed Satan’s control to not only bring hurt and heartache, but it was robbing me of my joy and happiness and I was robbing someone else of theirs.
Since I’ve apologized, the weight has been lifted. There is a peace in my heart that only came once I surrendered. I didn’t say all of this for recognition to myself, because anyone who knows me, knows I definitely don’t want to humiliate myself in front of my church. I did this to bring closure, not only in my life, but with hopes that if someone else is struggling with the same thing or maybe something different, they find the strength to do what’s needed to follow Christ more closely.
As Paul told us in Philippians, we aren’t bound by the past and our mistakes. We are able to focus on improving each step of our race (knowing we carry Christ’s forgiveness) until we reach our final goal—meeting our Savior.